I know that I talk a lot about dreams on this blog. Lately I have felt like it's a lot of talk and not a lot of doing. For a while now I have been feeling really discouraged. I have a lot of things that I want to do in my life and it seems like none of it is happening. I also was starting to get really embarrassed to tell people what I am going to school for and what I want to do with it. When I tell people that I want to make crafting my career and open my own handmade/vintage store I get blanks stares or "Oh. really? That sounds,uh, interesting." and sometimes I even get "Oh. Well what about going into physical therapy?" That one really upset me. I spent a lot of time stressing about my future because of those snide comments that were less than supportive. I started to doubt my decision and thought about changing my major, yet again, to something safer and more secure.
Then I was involved in a discussion about the future and specifically the importance of education. A friend of mine, who is one of the most amazing women I have ever met, said that she is always asked "How long did it take for you get to where you are today?" she replied "Many many years." and every time the person says "Well thats too long." Then my friend said something that really struck me. She said that in four years you will be four years older. You will have lived through those four years no matter what, but whether or not you actually did something in those four years is up to you. You are a product of your decisions.
I have thought about this a lot and asked myself. Four years from now what do I want to be doing? Who do I want to be? I realized that I want to be doing what I love and I want to be a better person who has worked hard to get where I am and has taken the time to learn and grow. If in four years I am the same person that I am now it's because I didn't try.
Right then I knew what I wanted to do, but I still didn't know how to get there. A couple days later I was in another discussion and someone said that it is not the big steps that count the most. It's the little ones. Have you ever seen that movie What About Bob? Baby steps to the door. Baby steps into the hallway. It's all about taking one step at a time. Taking a little step is a whole lot easier than attempting to take a step that crosses continents.
Once I had figured out how to get there I still was worried about how I was going to get everything that comes up in my life done and how to get through it all. Then a friend of mine talked about carpe diem, seize the day. Much like taking baby steps, take it one day at a time. Live in the moment and only worry about what you need to do for that day only.
I don't know how it happened, but literally every question/worry that I have had about the future has been answered in just a two week time span! I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I also feel like I am still standing at the bottom of a really steep mountain, but this time I am ready to climb.
So I decided to make a page on my blog that lists all of my dreams/goals for the future. They can be realistic, practical, unrealistic, impractical, impossible, small, big. Whatever. Then, as I make them into true stories I will cross them off and blog about them. So keep an eye out for my new page coming in the next week!
Carli
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